Sunday, March 20, 2011

SEX-Why is it so controversial?

I have asked myself this many times and still I have no answer. As a human being, there are biological imperatives we are born with, connected with having physical bodies. We have to eat and drink or we will die...that leads to having to eliminate. We also have an inborn drive to procreate, which reaches a fever pitch at some point in our lives...in men when they are awash in hormones and hard 24/7, and in women when their biological clock demands that they try to get pregnant. Some are born with a low sex drive and can take it or leave it, some are born with the kind of sex drive that doesn't allow them to ignore it. Not a choice...a condition of biology.
What I totally don't understand is why we are not supposed to talk about sex. Or write about sex. When in reality, trying to suppress people from talking about, reading about, watching other people, and having sex, just results in twisting what should be a normal biological drive that is easily satisfied, into a travesty that little resembles what it should be.
When you feel urges you can satisfy yourself...unless you are taught it is forbidden, in which case you will try
to ignore those impulses until that is all you can think about.
When you are attracted to someone you can choose to have sex or not to have sex. If you are a man, you are thought of as a stud if you do have sex with many women. If you are a woman, you are called nasty, insulting names if you have sex with many men.
SIGH.
Why is sex so different from other appetites? We not only eat and drink openly, we celebrate it by going out to restaurants to do so. No one thinks of that as odd or prohibited. So why is sex considered so "nasty"? For women, that is, not for men.
I blame religion and the tendency of people to want to tell others how to live. Religious people don't want anyone to enjoy their bodies because they figure that's not the important part of you, though I have never understood how doing things to make your body feel good impacts your immortal soul. And personally, I have no interest in learning what anyone else does in their bedroom or any other room of their house for that matter. So keep your nose out of my sex life, I'll ignore yours, and we will all be the h
appier.
As for why I write graphic sex scenes, I do so because I'm telling the story of two people who fall in love, and to me having sex is a natural, normal part of falling in love. Everyone in the world will/has fallen in love at some point in their life. Or in lust. That is universal. So why does it make some people so uncomfortable to realize that? Why is it that the people who are most interested in poking their noses into the prurient details of other people's sex lives, and in trying to be sure that no one enjoys it, at least not in the way they feel to be wrong, are the ones who are shocked at the idea of reading about it?
Hypocrisy much?
I guess I'm just confused as to the whole shame thing that is supposed to accompany writing erotic romance, or romance of any kind. If I wrote books that involved cutting to surf waves washing on the beach after the hero and heroine kiss, would that be alright? Boring, yes, but acceptable? If that's what you enjoy reading, there are books written for you. But I got bored with euphemisms and suggested activiti
es that are never shown, back when I was in high school...and that was a long time ago!
I don't write porn or one-handed reads, unless some scenes in my books inspire you in that direction, in which case, I'm flattered and you're welcome. I write stories about real people who have dreams and aspirations, and lives of their own. When they fall in love it will involve sex. Not ONLY sex, but it will be there. If you don't like to read graphic scenes, don't read my books. But if you do, I hope you enjoy mine as much as I enjoy writing them!

Fiona's website is: www.fionamcgier.com, where in honor of St. Paddy's day, her first page blog this month involves what she learned from her Dad about the religious strife in Ireland.

Prescription For Love, the 6th book in her Reyes Family Romances series, is available as a free download at:
http://smashwords.com/b/18367
Blurb: Enrique Reyes was named after his grandfather, and together they visited his hometown in Mexico, where Enrique is now happy being the doctor. The only thing he is missing is a wife. When Tanora Doyle, a bi-racial research biologist arrives in town, he is intrigued. But will the baggage she carries keep them apart? Or can Enrique cure whatever ails her, and solve his problem as well?

And coming April 1st from Whiskey Creek Press/Torrid will be her latest stand-alone novel:
The Reluctant Bride

Veterinarian Pamela Wilson always used to run away from home to get attention from her status-conscious, preoccupied parents. Years ago she met a man who loved her unreservedly, but her parents didn't approve of his blue-collar job, so she ran away from him too. When the ambitious lawyer she's marrying answers a phone call while she's walking down the aisle, it's the last straw! She runs away again, this time to a cabin her parents don't know about, owned by the mechanic. Does he still own it and is he still single? Will she finally stop running away and make the right decision for her future?


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